Lonely Tears

By Maria Soto-Arzola
Published on LatinoLA: July 20, 2005


As I sit here in the early morning before the sun rises
I start reading the letter you wrote to me a month before you left.
Reading your words of a strong woman knowing that she will no longer
partake in her children's lives.
I am so selfish because I only think of the pain I was in
The pain that my heart still feels.
Wanting to go to sleep so I can visit you in my dreams.
Missing your words of wisdom. Your words of encouragment, your
wise words about this thing we call "marriage."
I stop and think, what would she say? What would she think?
I'm lost without you, but I know I have to be strong and go on...
You know me so well. If you only knew I did hesitate because you
were no longer here to help me get ready for that "big day" the day
my dad walked me down the aisle. It was supposed to be the happiest day
of my life and it was, but no one saw the tears in my heart knowing
that I couldn't turn around and smile at you from across the room.
My heart hurts becuase you are not near. So tonight and everyday that
goes by I will go to sleep thinking of your beautiful smile, your words of
wisdom and encouragement and I'll look up at the sky and smile at you
cause I know you'll be looking down at me hugging me and wishing me a
Happy Birthday! I miss you always.....
Thanks mom for giving me life!

About Maria Soto-Arzola:
Mia Soto-Arzola

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