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Post-projects Halloween Misadventures
The tradition of kids going door to door trick or treating is passing away because of the times we live in
By
Al Carlos Hernandez, Contributing Editor
Published on LatinoLA:
October 29, 2009
It is probably a sign of the times, but kids don't trick or treat at our house much anymore. Every year there are less and less visitors. This doesn't dissuade us from buying more and more candy. Maybe it's because we installed one of those motion detector lights that only go on when someone comes up the stairs. This year we may disable it so kids can come by and I don't have to eat fifteen pounds of chocolate candy. I only buy the kind of candy that I like, no doubt sublimating and over compensating for unfulfilled trick or treating experiences in the past.
Back in the day in the "housing projects," trick or treating was a major event. My brothers, sister and local apartment mate homies would go out as a group and quite methodically work the community. After an hour or two of warm up trick or treating around the projects, we would get an adult to drive us to the better neighborhoods to really rack up on name brand candy because the treats back home were often weak. Project folk would try to pass out whacked stuff like homemade pan dulce, lumpias, cheese sandwiches, poker chips, and dice.
More savvy projects parents, ours included, would sometimes send the kids out earlier to gather goodies Then when local kids came to the door they would give them the lousy treats they didn't want like ABC gum, unwrapped candy with lint on it, and throwing apples.
Every year I had the cheapest black cat costume imaginable. It consisted of a mask with a rubber band and a black hospital gown thing. This 'fit' was one step above drawn-on mascara striped whiskers and hair spiked up with Dippity-do. No matter which house we would go to, I'd get the same reaction in several different languages: "What is this kid? A beaver? A muskrat?A weasel?" Our knock-on-the-door speech became rote and dispassionate. I would try to say, "Trick or Treat, I'm a black cat." Since the mask muffled my speech, they often time mistook me for being a "challenged" kid and gave me a little extra for trying so hard.
Fortuitously, pretending to be stupid has served me well throughout the years.
My family's trick or treating style was quite dichotomous. My older brother would say something like, "Good evening. This is a non-threatening, non-invasive trick or treat. My brother here is apparently a black cat with some hygiene issues." My younger brother, who was always the cutest one of us, would say, "Trick or treat! Candy or money! I'm dressed up like yo mama."
Our parents were very liberal when it came to our candy. Their philosophy was that if we earned it, we can keep it, as long as we broke them off a little something-something when we checked out our stash. Dad would always get first dibs on the caramels and mom would take anything she wanted. And that was fine with us.
I maintain the philosophy of lassie faire when it comes to a child's sovereign acquisition of candy. If you can get it, you can keep it. Many a seasoned trick or treater went on to become a mega vacuum cleaner sales person. Or a high ranking religious zealot.
My wife and I, however, differ in our philosophies as to how the candy should be dispersed. Her attitude is to save the candy for the kids and give them one piece per day after a well balanced dinner. This socialistic type of thinking severely undermines the drive and the motivation of kids trying to "get paid." Speaking for myself, I remember my demeanor as a raggedy, shot to the curb, jackal rat-faced, dork monkey-looking, challenged cat in prison pajamas. If mom and dad held our candy in trust and then piece-mealed out the treats one day at a time, it would have killed our motivation to knock our knuckles raw and climb pyramids of stairs, while carrying a shopping bag full of dreams.
The tradition of kids going door to door trick or treating is passing away because of the times we live in. There are more freaks answering the door than going to the door asking for candy. The time of innocence is gone in America. Now kids go with their parents to the mall or to school sponsored harvest festivals to celebrate the day.
Maybe it's better this way. More candy for us.
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Comentarios (y chismes) from our Amigos y Amigas...
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Why do I have to write my email twice? You dont think I know how to spell my own email? I'm gonna...oh oops. Be right back.
There.
Al as always insightful and hilarious. So you were the one that scared my kids so bad. Ok We'll see about payback now.
I'll send my grandchildren to your home. You'll see! |
Al Carlos, enjoyed the article on the Trick or Treat thing. The reality of the dangers and social-idiosyncrasies are all there and amusing. I was raised in a mixed neighborhood on the Southside of Los Angeles. Things got really wacked back in the mid-1970s and really could not trust anyone. You were right stating that there were more freaks answering the doors than trick or treating. We were able to keep the ritual down to the minimum with our one kid. Now that we have our grandkid, we have to deal with it again. This time its the economy, non-trusting neighbors (including myself), and the FREAKs answering the doors. Sorry but this is a stupid Holiday America – give it up!
Thanks LatinoLA, Al Carlos, and contributing editors. |
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